Unlucky Kitty
by Fuzzyfur9
Summary: what happens when tobi brings a kitty in the Akatsuki, what will happen? fighting or making cookies? what if the kitty turns out to be a magic neko and puts them in the tv.my first fan-fic thing.
1. Prologe

**this is my first fan-fic so be nice i guess this about akatsuki if they brought a magical neko meant to be funny or crack if i spell there names wrong tell me. pairings don't know only sasdei and peinkon**

**rated t for a certian siver headed nija**

**WARING: alot of OC and little bit yoai**

**Disclaimer: I don't own nothing expet the story and the kitty**

"speaking" _'thinking'_ **---timeskip----**

**in zetus case "black side"** _"white side"_

**Prologe**

**-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------**

One rainy stormy night in the Akatsuki lair, everyone was making cookies….

Ok not really but they where in the living room watching a scary movie called **_Dead_****_Silence_**. _'What a piece a of shit of a movie' _thought Hidan. 'Don't go in there don't in un' thought Deidara holding into the pillow couch. In the middle of the movie everyone heard a crack noise. Everyone turn their heads to the door. Lighting flash and thunder and their was two shadows in the door way.

Girly screams could be heard from Itachi, Hidan, and Deidara and the one of the shadows and leader. Everyone look at the four in the room that just scream.

"Oh my god the world is at an end." Said Konan "I mean I understand Deidara but Itachi and Pein" she added.

"Hey un" said a pissed Deidara.

"I didn't scream" pouted Pein. "

Sure you didn't" she said.

"Tobi is a good boy" said one of the shadows said.

"**pff what all much of sissy** _for once I agree"_said both half of Zetus.

"So how was the mission" said Pein in a superior voice. "Tobi and Zetus did good and we found a kitty named Oreo" said a happy Tobi. "It brought a note saying:

_If u be ncie to me I'll be ncie to you but, if yuor eivl to me yuo'll pay the pcire._

_Form Oreo" _read Tobi aloud.

"Meow" meow a tabby ginger she-cat. Everyone look at her. "Tobi come here un" said Deidara. Tobi walk over to him. Smack

Deidara slap Tobi behind the head. "Why semipi" said a whimpering Tobi. "For bring a rodent un and FOR SCARING THE HELL OUT OF ME UN!!" yelled a very pissed Deidara. "Sorry Deidara-sempia" said Tobi.

"Great now we have to spend more money on the stupid cat" said Kakuzu having anime tears.

Oreo stare the whole room and start waling around. She then went up to Konan. "Meow purr" Oreo purr rubbing her head against her. "Ahh she cute" she said picking her up and putting her in her lap and storing her head.

"Let's keep her" plead Konan.

"No" said Kakuzu.

"Yes"

"no"

"yes"

"no"

"shut up we'll have a vote" said leader.

"Zetues?"

"**NO** _yes"_then Zetues stared arguing with himself

"Deidara"

"no un" he Said. Then Konan shot him a glare "say yes or else I'll tell your secret" she said treating. With that Deidara got scared "leader I change my answer to a yes un" said a nerves Deidara.

"Mm okay… Sasori" said Pein

"What the brat said" Sasori said broadly

"Itachi"

"No"

"Hidan?"

"Mm yes" said Hidan evilly _'noted to self kill the fucking thing later'_ he thought grinning to himself evilly

Pein look at Hidan wondering what he was thinking. "Ok we have 4 yes and 4 no is a tied next Kisame" said Leader

"Mmm" he was thinking nervously who look from Itachi and Konan. _'If I say yes Itachi will kill me if I say no Konan will kill me or ask leader to kill me'_he thought

"YES" he yell and sreamedl like a girl and running to his room. Everyone in the room including Oreo look where Kisame was with wide-eyes.

"ok that was awkward" said Pein

"we keep the cat" he decaled

"NNNNOOOOOO" yelled Kakuzu and he went to his emo corned and stared to anime crying.

"Come on how bad can a having a kitty be" said Leader.

"Hey Danna bet you gonna it is going to be bad un" said Deidara.

"Bet you it won't and what's the prize" said Sasori although Deidara is right. "If I win I'll be seme and you the uke for a night un and if you win…" "I'll be seme and you'll be my slave for a month." Said Sasori interrupting him. "do we have a deal" The blond nodded and shake the redhead hand.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

please review and rated u get cookies


	2. Money lover & Jashin follower

**here's chapther 1 enjoy**

**declimer: everything expet the plot and the cat**

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 6 WEEKS LATER~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ever since Oreo came, everything was a hell hole. They had to take turns giving her food, making sure the rooms where locked. Most of them hated the cat, while Tobi and Konan love her, Kakuzu was going more a lot to his emo cornered for spending a lot of money for the flee-bag. Hidan is trying to come up with a plan to scarifies her. Zetus is having trouble not to eat her.

Monday

Everyone was in the kitchen "Oreo lunch time" said Tobi. But nothing happen. "Oreo?" yelled Tobi.

"Has any of you seen her" he asks them.

Everyone shakes their heads.

"Hey have any of you seen my account book" ask Kakuzu walking in the kitchen.

"I swear I left it in the room" he muttered. He searched everywhere in the room but no luck.

"Check again in your room" suggest Konan.

Kakuzu left the room went into the hall way, up the stairs. When he reached his door he noticed the door was open _'wasn't close'_ he thought. Walking inside he stood their in shocked and wide eye. Their it was his account book ripped on the bed, everywhere were papers, white and green. Some of the money was either bitten or tear apart. And on his, the thing that caused all this messed, the pile of fur sleeping in his once account book.

What seem likes generations "OREO AM GOING TO KILL YOU AND WISH YOU WERE NEVER BORN" yelled a pissed Kakuzu.

Oreo waking up from her nap look at Kakuzu with innocent eyes saying _'I did nothing wrong'. _"OH DON'T GIVE ME THAT LOOK, LOOK WHAT YOU DONE" he yelled.

Oreo got up scratch herself, getting a perfect 20 dollar bill and ran for her life, going downstairs, to the kitchen. "OH NO YOU DON'T YOU PICE OF FLEE-BAG" he yelled going after her.

When he got to the kitchen he saw her in the sink, holding the bill near the garbage diposer. His eyes went wide "don't. You. dare." He said. With that she let go of the 20 dollar bill, and pull the switch on, and green paper flew. "NNNNOOOO" yelled Kakuzu running to the sink trying to grab the she-cat.

Oreo jump on top of him and went to the dinner room and went on Tobi's lap.

"There you are" Tobi said right then Kakuzu came in "YOU'RE GOING TO DIE PIECE OF SHIT" growled Kakuzu running towards Tobi and Oreo. Then Hidan and Kismae came in and held him.

"LET ME GO I GOT TO KILLED HER" he yelled looking at Hidan and then at Oreo who stuck her tough at him.

With that got him even angrier, trying to get free of the hold but couldn't.

"Calm yourself down" said the big fishy

"What's with all the noise" ask sasori coming in with Deidara and weasel boy to see the show.

"THAT thing got my account book, my money and ripped and made a mess" growled Kakuzu glaring at the ginger she-cat.

"Really un" ask Deidara with wide-eye

"bad girl Oreo that wasn't nice." Scold Tobi.

"really now let me go got to kill cat" he growled. "all your money" said the scorpion.

"yes" said now a sad Kakuzu now cured up in a ball rocking back and forth, with his thumb in his mouth. "this is a bad dream Kaku just a bad dream" he said.

"we lost him un" said the blond. Everyone nod their heads. When everyone left the room including Kakuzu to grief for his money, which are probably in money haven by now. Oreo went to her room and got a book out with the list of people she wants to get.

Wednesday

After his daily ritual the silver hair priest went downstairs and only saw Deidara in the couch upside down watching TV "Yo bitch where all the fuckers in this house?" Hidan ask sitting next to the blond.

Deidara got up and look at him. "sasori-no-Danna, Kisame went out on a mission un Zetus is in his garden, Konan and Pein doing what ever they do un aaand Kakuzu is in his emo corner un and weasel face is in his room doing I don't know don't care un." He replied and taking a breather.

"oh" said the silver hair man.

They sat in silence.

"am going in my room un" said a tired Deidara.

"pff you're always tired when your bastard of a partner fucks you before a _mission_." Said Hidan

"What do you mean un" whined Deidara blushing a little.

"Sure oh Danna hard faster" Hidan said in a mocking girly voice.

"shut up un." Deidara protest blushing more.

"whatever you say bitch a lest am not a sissy faggot, I take it like a man" he said smirking.

Pouting and the now red Deidara went to his room.

Sitting in the couch alone, Hidan got bored but before he move he saw Oreo next to him and staring at him. "what are you looking at stupid? I know you can't understand but you better watch where you going because am going to kill you" he whisper to her.

She kept staring at him. "ha and here I am talking to a stupid shity cat hahah" he said laughing to him self.

"yes but it's mostly with your self meow." Said a mixture of British and Puerto Rican accent.

"what who said that come out" said a very confused Hidan getting up into a fighting stand. "ha now he's gone crazy" said the voice again. "okay mother fuckers show your face. I am getting really pissed you not showing your face." Spat Hidan, "Yo potty-mouth down here" said the voice. Hidan look down and only saw Oreo

"What the hell" he said

"oh now you noticed that I could talk meow" Oreo said while Hidan eyes went wide.

"you could a t...talk?" ask Hidan.

"no shit goldy locks" she hissed.

"Oh MY Jashin" scream Hidan "it's happing like in the movie that crazy cat form Alice in Wonder Land" he scream and went to his room and locking it.

"Pew lost it" he said relief

"over here dumbass" she said on top of his bed "you know now that you know my secret am going to ripped you apart." She hissed while her claws grew sharper and her eyes glittering and her body growing to a tiger size cat.

"AAHHH" scream the sliver hair men and went running to the hallway.

Oreo jumped in front of him and hiss. Still screaming he went to Kakuzu door and knocked like a manic "let me in" he said panicking.

But no answer. He heard a grow from behind him, he turn around and stare with scare wide eyes. Oreo jumped and quick as a flash he dodge and went to Deidara door and knock loud "Deidara help let me in" he said panicking. The door open a little reveling Deidara's face "what un?" he spat "let me in the cat is going to eat me" said Hidan quickly. "NO I thought you were a macho man not a sissy un" mocked Deidara and shuting the door. "no dammit bitch let me in, ok I was wrong let me in" he plead. _'ok Hidan be strong sure your afraid of cats that stare at you and disappear like in the movie but you can fight your not a sissy and it's a stupid cat'_ he kept telling himself. He look up and saw the cat in front of him forgetting what he just said he scream like sissy little girl.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~2 hours later~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hidan head was in the basement. there was blood everywhere his body was in his room way his legs where in the kitchen oven, and his arms in the couch. "fucking cat" he mumbled. "once am sew together I'll kill her. Yes because am not a sissy" he said to himself. "Ha you talk the talk but can you walk the walk meow" said the evil voice. When he heard it he started to panicked, "leave me alone please I'll fucking be nice" he pled not wanting to die. Oreo came closer to him and closer and…. Gave him a taco...

Ok she bit him in his ear and scratching his face.

"ahh some fucking help me stop fucking piece of shit" Hidan yelled. Then he heard the door open.

"Thank Jashin" he muttered.

"there you are Oreo bad kitty" scold Konan. The blue head lady got the kitty and put her in her arms. Then she walked back to the first floor. "WAIT BITCH GET ME OUT OF HER" the Jashinsits yelled.

Then he heard a noise behind him. '_oh crap' _thought Hidan. Then he felt two hands beside his cheeks and it was wet.

"what the hell?!" the head said.

"shut up un" hissed the blond.

"how the fuck did you get down here" the head said. Deidara shrug. They went up stairs. Took a turn and open a door which happens to be the bathroom. Deidara put Hidan head on the sink. "hey bitch why we here?" ask hidan. Deidara ignored Hidan he open the lids of the toilet seat and went over to hidan and grab him by the hair, and started walking to the toilet.

"what the fuck are you do mamsfhf..." what ever hidan said was cut of because Deidara threw the head inside the toilet and started flushing. "serves you right un" said Deidara and left him in the toilet. Hidan head turn over, "when I get that Bastard mother fucking bitch he's a dead she-male" he swore.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

**reveiw **

**the victems were hidan and kaku-kun**

**poor money and hidan head oh well**

**don't know what to do with deidara and sasori can someone give me ideas you get cookies cake and tacos**


	3. Scorpian & a Bomber

**~~~~~~~~~~~~~Three days later** ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After Hidan's accident everything was weird. Each time the kitty came near Hidan, he'll scream like a girl. If Kakuzu was near by his partner when that happen Hidan will have jump on him and hang on and screaming.

Sasori was sitting on the couch watching TV with the blonde who lying on his stomach. Deidara kept playing with his feet and Sasori's. They both continued watching tv until Hidan came.

"hey fuckers." He greeted. Both the lovers nodded.

"What you guys watching" he ask looking to his sides incase the ginger thing was near by.

"Jurassic Park un" replied Deidara. Hidan sat next to Sasori.

Just then Oreo came in the room and sat next the silver head. "meow" and look at him.

Hidan look at it back not showing emotion but in the inside.

'_don't scream she can't make you scare forever face it like a man and scarifies it to Jashin'_ said good Hidan

'**Just fucking it kill it and you scream I'll kill everyone including you' **said evil Hidan.

'Where the hell you fucking voice came from am not fucking Zetsu with different voice and that pink hair bitch who has different inners.' Thought Hidan.

'_Pity'_

'**Now you're fucking suck with us now ass whole.'**

'Fuck you'

'_Isn't that fucking your self.'_

'**hahaha what a mother fucker loser'**

'Wait a second if you call me that does it means your that as well'

'…_. Not really'_

'**Because we're better than you.'**

'What the fuck'

At the same time Hidan was arguing with himself, Sasori, Deidara, and Oreo stare at him like he was insane.

"Danna he's scaring me un" said Deidara since Hidan was making weird faces.

"It's ok Dei-Chan you know his insane" said Sasori putting the blonde on his lap and put his arms around his waist.

"True it was still funny un" said Deidara remember putting Hidan head in the toilet.

It took Kakuzu and Pein hours to take him out. And a whole day with out his body since Kakuzu was in his emo state. He laugh his ass off and even told Sasori about it who also laugh. Yup good memories.

Sasori smirk and nudge his head in Deidara's neck and kissing him. Oreo went up to Hidan and started rubbing him and meowing, just then Kakuzu came. Like a single it stop Hidan arguing with himself and scream like a girl scream when they see something bad, raped,ect.. then he jump on Kaukuzu who got him bridal style.

"Kau HELP THE THING AND IT'S CLAWS AND AND" Hidan said panting and panicking.

Kakuzu glare at the cat.

"…it's ok it won't hurt you no more am here" he said trying his best to comfort the Jasisnist. He heard the story of what happen between him and the cat although he doesn't it really believe it.

"shh it's ok" he comfort and walk away.

Deidara and Sasori stare at the little scene and started laughing when they left. Deidara got up from his Danna's lap.

"am going back to my room see ya later un" he said going back to his room.

Sasori sigh. He look at the cat who look back at him. _'ok for some reason it looks like she's smirking… evily'_ he thought

The cat stretches her back rising. Once she was done she went to the direction to Deidara room.

Sasori shook his head and surf the channel. He started watching the movie but couldn't get into it. He wonder what his boyfriend was doing. In the middle of stuff you don't want to know something interrupts his thoughts.

**BOOOM**

**BBBAAANNNGG**

**Bang**

**boom**

The whole base started to shake. Wondering what the hell was that the puppet got of the couch and went where the explosion was heard. It led where the hall led to the rooms. The whole hall was cover in smoke.

'_What the hell happen'_ he thought

He came up to his room and his mouth drop open and his eyes went wide.

His room was a mess. His work place was destroy. All hi scrolls where everywhere and paper too. All his puppets where either ruined or blow up or destroy. His bed was on fire so were some of his scrolls. All his weapon where mess up and scatter everywhere. His favorite puppet Hiruko was half ruin and burned. And in the middle in the room was who held responsible for it.

Deidara. Who was coughing.

Sasori couldn't think usually he will let it pass or something. Without thinking he went up to the bomber and slap really hard across the face. Causing the blonde to fall on the floor.

Deidara stare at him shocked and putting a hand on where he been slap.

"WHAT THE HELL YOU DID BRAT" yelled Sasori angry at him.

"I co-could ex-explain un" stutter Deidara close to tears.

Before he could think the red head kick him in the stomach. Hard.

Deidara started to cough and spit some blood.

"alright explain." Sasori growled.

"It was Or-Oreo she start to bug me and started insulating me by talking and so it piss me off so I started to throw bombs at her un. Then she came to a room and throw another bomb when I realized it was yours room so it was too late un." Deidara explain softly and crying.

"and you want me to believe that because..."

"it's the truth un. She did talk un" Deidara said desperately while Sasori snort.

"So your like Hidan now using the same excuse." Spat the red head. Deidara was going to say something but was cut of by the puppet himself.

"Get. Out." He growled

"What un" ask a confused Deidara.

"I said get out of my room" he hissed.

"Am sorry Danna un" apologized a crying Deidara.

"Sorry won't cut it now"

"Why?" Deidara ask. Sasori was getting impatience so he grab the blonde by his hair and toss him not that hard but near the doorway.

"I said get out I don't want to see you"

"But Danna un"

"GET OUT" screams the angry puppet.

Deidara started crying hard and left to his room.

Sasori sigh and rub his head which was coming to give him a head ache.

"Whoa what happened here? And why was Deidara crying?" ask Kisame wondering what happened since he heard a lot of noise.

"The brat exploded the room and I …. Hit him" he said the last part softly. He still couldn't believe he hit his uke.

"Damn that bad." The blue man ask, and Sasori nodded. The short man was staring to feel guilty for what he did.

"Oh what he did it any ways?" ask Kisame leading on the doorframe.

"Some thing of the Oreo taking to him and insulting him or something like that." He said what the blonde told him.

"still you shouldn't had hit him" said Kisame " you should apologies to the Blondie… oh my god I sound like Konan."

Sasori chuckle at the last part but then sigh. "I know but not now. Am still mad and am afraid it might happen again."

Kisame nodded as he understood.

Then they heard a meow. Both of the men look down and saw the cat coming out of the red head bed. Oreo look up at them for sec and then walk out the door.

"Is it me or did it look like if she had evilness in her eyes." Ask Kisame. Sasori only nodded. For some reason he feels something bad will happen.

Deidara was in his bed crying. He still couldn't believe that his Danna hit him. It wasn't his fought he blow up the room.

"Aw what are you crying about" said a voice that had a hint of amusement in it.

Deidara look at the door way to see who it was and start glaring. Oreo was in the doorway.

"Get out."

"No beside you got delivery" she said. Going up to him she gave him a letter.

_Dear Deidara,_

_I hate you for destroying everything. You where always a screw up a spoil little brat. I don't want to hear from you ever again. An if I see your pafitci little face again I will hurt you. Why? Because you ruin everything._

_From Sasori_

_P.S. It's over who wants to be with a crybaby like you._

_P.S.S Art is not a bang!!! It eternal get it through that thick blonde heads of yours._

Deidara read it two more times, and start it to cry miserly. When he stop he look around for Oreo but she just disappear. He felt anger and depress. He got his bed sheets and blow his nose and wiped the tears away.

'_how can Danna say those things un.'_ He thought.

Just then there was a knock.

"Open up Deidara" said a voice.

Deidara knew fully well who it was and became angry.

"NO" he yelled and curl up into a ball.

"OPEN UP BRAT I WANT TO TALK TO YOU" yelled Sasori.

"NO" and the blonde start to cry again.

Sasori heard crying behind the door. So he opens the door. He saw his lover crying and curl up. He walks up to the bed and sits down.

"get out" whisper the younger of the two. Sasori sigh

"No not until you tell me what's wrong" he said. Deidara look up his nose was red and so was his eyes. He glare at the puppet

"What's wrong?" he ask "I'll tell you it's you saying awful things to me and..and… ART IS A BANG UN!!!"

"what the hell are you talking about and no your wrong it's eternal."

"You broke of with me because I was a crybaby that's not true un. Fleeting un." He reported. Sasori look confused.

"What?! Eternal plus you are one." He argues.

"No am not you're a man whore un"

"Look whose taking"

"Everything is your fault art Is fleeting believe it un"

"oh now you're like that kyubii brat with believe it." Spat Sasori.

"no but it still is fleeting plus you never want to see me again un" hissed Deidara

"when I said that, no art meant to last forever" argue Sasori.

"In the room and you even wrote it un. Art is meant to be seen one moment and then gone un." With that said Deidara gave him the letter.

Sasori read and got angry.

"are you that much like an idiot. I didn't wrote this plus this isn't my hand writing."

"sure it isn't un. And why should I believe you un" report Deidara. Sasori stare at him with disbelief.

"because I never lie"

"yeah right same way I lie to you un"

"…" Sasori stayed silent not knowing what to say.

"Get out and don't ever talk to me un" Deidara said angrily. Sasori stood up and glare at him and started to walk away. And look at him,

"fine but don't think I will help you ever again. Useless brat"

"ART IS A BANG UN" he stated

"NO IT'S NOT" yelled Sasori.

Deidara look at the letter over again and realized that the puppet was right. ' still not going to apologies' he thought

Sasori went back to his room and stop noting the cat in his room. Oreo was staring at him and smirk. Which scare Sasori a little.

"You both are mouse-brain as I thought." She said with amusement. Sasori stare there surprise and shocked. Taking the silence she went on. "I made the blonde go mad to do this and wrote the little note. Ha and you guys call yourselves criminals and what about you weren't you suppose to be a smart person" and she chuckle.

Sasori glare at her and throw a poison needle at her but miss. Oreo went outside the door.

* * *

**sorry fo rthe long wait and some spelling errors XP**

**anyways review **

**i think it's going to get better since the agrument kinda stuck**


	4. SUSHI & WEASEL

Few 15 week pass since the cat came to the base. Also strange things happen well at least to some members. Luckily I wasn't one of them. First was Kakuzu, next Hidan, then Deidara and Sasori. Those four hate the thing so much I wonder why didn't they threw kill it already. I have a feeling am next I hope not. I never done anything to her so why should I be a victim.

I was at the kitchen table eating cereal. Just thinking about random stuff. I was alone until Hidan came in the room going threw the cabinet for food. Smirking I did a cat noise although it came sort wrong. The Jashinist jumped up screaming then glare at me.

"What the hell?" he growl I chuckle.

"Wow you're really scare of the cat." I stated while he glare at me.

"No I wasn't!" he snap "beside if I see it again I'll kill it. It will be a good sacrifice for Jashin."

"Right. I bet right now your so call Jashin is making fun of you for being scare of the cat." I replied.

"That's what you think Kisame just you watch me I'll kill am going to get her heart out and cut her head out and and"

"Ok ok I get it already." I interpret him rolling my eyes. He snort.

"Meoorww."

Hidan eyes went wide and look at the floor behind me. I look were he was looking at and saw it was Oreo this time. She went over to Hidan was going to rub on him. The said man scream that made wonder if he really was a guy since he scream like a girly girl. The guy jump on top of the counter.

"Get away from!! Crap" he yelled when he hit his head on the cabinet.

"Meow" she tilt her head and put her forepaws on the counter's wall.

"AHHHH GET THE FUCK AWAY" he scream. I started laughing hard.

The cat sat back down and jump were Hidan was.

"GET AWAY FROM YOU DAMN BITC H!!!!!" he scream and tried to kick the cat away. That only made me laugh harder.

The silver head look at me with fear and rage. "SHUT THE HELL UP!!"

The Jashinists kept kicking and fell to the floor and crawl under the table. Oreo following him her eyes were full of mischief. As if got closer Hidan went running out of the table and somehow jump all the way from top of the fridge. The cat kept following him and put her paws on the fringe door meowing.

I kept laughing harder and harder until I fell from mine chair and holding my stomach from the pain of laughing.

"SHUT UP MOTHER FUC AHHHHHH!!" He scream in terror when the cat jump. Hidan kept cursing and screaming until his partner came in.

Just at the sight of him Hidan jump down from the fridge and in a blink of an eye was on top of Kakuzu.

"KILL THE DAMN THING. KAKUZU HELP THE FUCKING CAT WANTS TO KILL ME." Yelled Hidan scrambling to get on top of his head. I laugh really hard I think I was about to pee on mine self. Luckily I didn't I mean this look like a T.V show or something like that.

I don't know how but the mask man grab hold of the silver head that was on him and carry him bridal style. Before he left he glare at both of us.

When they left I finally clam down of laughing and wipe a tear from mine eyes. I chuckle and look at Oreo.

I don't know if it was my imagination or something but I swear that I saw evilness in her eyes when look at me. Naw it's me going crazy but I still felt uneasy.

I went to mine room a couple of hours later. As I enter I lock the door behind me and sat down on my bed. I took of mine cloak and what was inside one of the pockets. I turn to the other side of my bed where there was a night stand.

"How are my ladies doing today?" I ask. There was a fish bowl on the table and two came out from their hiding places. They replay what fish do best. One name was Rainbow since she had all the colors of the rainbow and the other was call Aunt Dory cause well she is really my aunt. It's a long story and am too lazy to explain.

"That good and look what I brought you guys." I said to them in a smoochy voice.

I took out what was inside the bag. Two beautiful dress one was blue with some shiny stuff on it the other was a pretty pink dress with glittery stuff.

Both fish look happy well to me they did and were doing some front flips. I started to put their dress on. Once I was finish someone call my name.

"Don't worry honey. Papa is coming right back and with some food." I said.

Turn out that Itachi need help getting his hair out of the blender which somehow got suck. Don't ask me how but it did and then it got stuck on the stove resulting burn hair. After I help him I saw Deidara running away from Tobi who was going to do something and I was suck at the middle of the weird situation. I think Tobi want to ask the blonde out since he "broke up" with puppet boy.

I sigh and as I was about to open the door I called out "don't worry ladies Kisame came back."

Then I look at the fish bowl and mine eyes went wide. There was no fish but a scrap of the pink dress from Aunty Dory. As I look closer I saw some blood and a tail or was it a fin.

"Meow" meow the one and only Oreo. I look at her and saw her purring and licking her paws at least I saw her mouth. Inside was something blue and pink.

I shriek and jump to get her.

The cat at the last minute jump over me and head to the door. I scream in rage and started following her. I was casing a racket at least I got her corner. She started to hiss as she was touching the wall.

"AM GOING TO KILL YOU AND FEED YOU TO ZETSU!!!!" I yelled at her and went to grab her.

As I was doing that her claws came out and scratch me at the face and one of my hand. I screech in pain that was when she ran beneath from me. I turn around and started to follow her at top speed.

I saw her at on top of the couch I jump missing her and land on someone. I look down and saw Sasol.

"Get of me." He snapped.

"With pleasure" I snapped back and got up stepping on him and running after the wick thing.

I saw jump on top on Tobi's arm. I tackle both of them. Tobi cry out in surprise.

Deidara came out and got me of Tobi and the cat who got knock out. I went free from the blonde's grip but was stop by Leader and Itachi.

Both man were holding me back.

"LET ME GOO NOW!!" I scream trying to get free.

"What wrong Kisame? Your never like this." Said Itachi in a causal tone considering the situation we're on.

"THAT FUCKING BITCH THING." I screech.

"What she do now" groan Pein.

"SHE SCRATCH ME AND AND …ATE MY FISH!" I scream then started crying .

That got everyone from surprise. The two man that were holding me let go of me and I drop to the floor and started crying.

Tobi started scolding Oreo and interpret him "if I see t-that th-thing again I 'll kill it." I said sobering.

**Normal P.O.V **

Two days has pass since Oreo ate kisame's fish. Itachi was sitting beside his partner on his bed conformening him.

"Why Itachi I- I di-didn't do anything to her." Cried Kisame "waaaa Rainbow and and aunty"

He started to cry uncontrollably. Itachi was surprise that Kisame really strong and big was actually crying like a baby.

"There there I think they went to fish heaven." The Uchiha said.

When Kisame fell asleep Itachi went to the living room to see if there was anything good on T.V

What he saw was Sasori and Hidan making plans to kill Oreo. He look at them.

"Why not cutting her head." Suggest Hidan.

"Cause it'll be hard since she really fast." Said Sasori "I think she should suffer. I say throw her poison."

The raven head rolled his eyes. All Hidan and the other that were victims of the damn cat were only talking about to kill her and stuff but never even done nothing.

He change his mind of watching TV in peace so he went to his room.

Once in his room he went to the left of his wall from his room. He made sure that no one was looking at im or spying at him.

Then he did some hand signs and the wall appear a door. He open the door and walk inside.

Inside was a secret room that had a big closet with dresses and girls cloth. Also there was a full body mirror and a table with makeup and stuff. On the mirror there was picture of Kisame with his underwear on.

Itachi smirk and walk to his closet and pick out a girls sailor uniform. He put the skirt then the shirt. He untied his hair and shake his hair and messy it a little.

He look himself at the mirror and twirl around.

He tried different cloths on. His last one was a pretty pink dress without the lace. He went up to his mirror and pick one of Kisame picture he had in a drawer and twirl around and kissing the picture.

"ITACHI WHERE THE FUCK ARE YOU KISAME AND KONAN NEEDS HELP ON THE KITCHEN!" yelled Hidan.

Itachi frown but he smile the Uchiha smile when he heard his lover name and put his cloak back on. He decide to leave the dress on since it was up to his knee and the cloak cover all that. He tied his hair has he always does.

When he left he didn't notice that a certain thing was in there.

After finishing with the kitchen he went back to his room remembering he forgot to lock his secret room luckily everyone was at the room. Oh so he thought.

When he got there he look inside and stood there with his eyes wide open.

The place was a disaster. Every cloths was on the floor ruin and shredded. But what got him more shock and in rage was all the picture of Kisame was on the floor shred, cut ruin.

While stay still like a statue a certain orange tabby came out of the room.

Itachi look at her with full rage and what got him even more angrier was that she had one of his favorite picture of Kisame in her mouth.

"GIVE. THAT. BACK." He shouted at her.

"FAT CHANGE GIRLY. TO THINK THAT DEIDARA WAS THE GIRLY ONE AROUND. YOU EVEN BEAT KONAN." Snap the cat and made her escape.

That caught the Sharingan user by surprise. Not the part of him being more girly I always knew that but that the cat actually talked. After what seem like eternity he got out of it and went chasing after the wicked thing.

He saw her turn a corner. After he caught up to her she was standing on one of the sofa laughing.

"Hahaha this is good. To think the video in YouTube was priceless but this one sure is." Laugh Oreo but stop when the Uchiha came looking piss.

"You wouldn't dare" she hissed grinning.

Itachi went towards her. Oreo jump and land on his back. She got her claws out and slashes his cloak.

"YOU BITCH" Itachi scream and throw himself on the ground. Lucky he succeeded on smashing the cat. The unlucky part was that everyone was there to see what was going on.

He got up and stayed quiet.

"Itachi-san what was that about?" ask Konan.

"Meow" groans the cat on the floor.

"OREO WHAT DID YOU DO TO HER?" cry Tobi running up to her.

he was about to replay the cloak magically came off reviling an Itachi Uchiha with a pink dress on.

Everyone stood there in silence to make matters worse Oreo hand Tobi the photo of the blue man.

Then the whole base started to laugh out loud. Although when Tobi show Kisame the photo he stood there with wide eyes.

Itachi started to blush from embarrassment and rage.

"You look like a fairy." Said Deidara

"Naw more like a princess" said Hidan

"A ballerina" Kakuzu.

"SHUT UP !!!" with that said the weasel went running to his room cry his eyes out.

* * *

**finally i finsh this chapter . its was delete and had to started all over it again.**

**oh well**

**now the really fun part is going to start. -finally-**

**ok so review please u get cookies ^~^**


	5. The PLAN Chibyfy

Three days pass since the accident of Itachi and Kisame. Itachi stayed in his room those pass days only God knows or Jashin. While Kisame try not to cry like a baby thinking about his fishy. Everyone one been in there own room till Kakuzu and Hidan went to everyone's room well the one that were victims of Oreo at least.

Everyone was at the living room surprise to see that Kakuzu and Hidan were the one saying the meeting.

"Ok since everyone is here we decide to make a plan to kill the cat demon thing." Said Kakuzu.

"Yeah how are we suppose to do that un?" ask Deidara.

"well we don't know yet. We thought in this secret meeting we could come up with something." Said the oldest man in the room.

"yeah like we could get a good idea from that blonde idiot." Mutter Sasori making Deidara glare at him.

Before the two artists could go into a fight Kisame broke them apart.

"look if you two don't want to be here then go back to your room and let the cat keep ruining your life." The blue man stated making the other two stop fighting.

"so how has an idea?" ask Sasori.

Everyone started to think about it. After a moment of silence no one had anything.

"great we're fucking screw." Said Hidan.

"not really." Said Itachi for the very first time since the meeting start and three days. Everyone look at him.

"well tell us." Everyone said.

"ok its pspsspsps." Itachi was telling them the idea. Everyone seems to agree thinking it might work.

"wait why the fuck do I have to be damn victim again?" ask Hidan.

"cause your scare of her and you can lead her to the trap." Stated Itachi.

"ok but if she turns to that scary thing again I'll hunt you guys till you die." The silver man said.

"ok let the plan being."

Oreo was lying on Tobi's bed who was out of on some strange mission. She was sleeping peacefully till she heard something.

Hidan was inside the room tip toe inside. He grabs his scythe in his hand. He was standing in front of Oreo who flick her ears. Hidan sigh and turn black and white with his scythe ready.

"Oreo" he said softly.

Oreo was chasing a mouse until she heard somebody call her name. She blink her eyes once her eyes adjust she got up with her hair up and hiss.

"oh my god it's the grim reaper!!!!" she yowled and jump out of the bed and went running to the door fast as you can say taco.

Hidan chuckle if he knew this from the very started he could have kill her weeks ago. He went after until the others do their stuff.

"ay dios mio help me. I don't want to die." She yelled. She looks back and ran faster.

Sasori heard yelling and smirk. He had one of his creepiest puppets and made it go out of its hide place.

As Oreo turn another corner she saw something there. Before she could stop the thing rise it head chattering and was about to grab her. The tabby hair rise up and shriek in terror. She went the other way Ending up hitting the wall.

"cadaho!" she cursed and sped the way she came from and going to another turn. She thought she lost them until a brief came into view. She stop track and went up to it.

"hey little birdie could you help please there's a reaper on the loose ahhhh" she scream when the bird explode. Then more explosions came towards her. She hit the wall and tried to get up. When she did she limps to the other hall.

'strange it's like am going in circle naw.' She thought.

Then the scariest hideous creature came up to her. She didn't know who it was but its arms, legs were split up and some strange string were coming out of its mouth. One of the arms went to grab her but she jump and went screaming to another way.

Thinking she was safe water started to come in the room. She started to jump on the nearest thing not to touch the water. Like flash the room was flood to the top. Oreo was under water and trying to get to the top.

Then came three sharks came towards her. Bubbles came out of her mouth as she screams. Then the water was going down and she was going with the current to random places while she was screaming.

When there was no water she coughs and tried to breath and cruse in different laungues for her fur being wet. Just as she was going to tried herself six shadow figures came towards her. Once again her fur rise in terror and ran.

Each she turns a corner it seems like she was running to the same place over and over aging. She stops in the living room corner. She gulp and turn to run were she just came from but stop dead looking in terror at the six figures.

They turn out to be the six victims she gave a hell to. Sasori, Itachi, Deidara, Kakuzu, Kisame, and Hidan were blocking her way out to the exited.

"we got her guys we got her un." Said Deidara grinning.

"time to rip and tear everything out from her." Said Hidan licking his scythe.

"he he guys maybe we could talk about this." Said Oreo getting nervous. Her ears went down and duck when Hidan swing his scythe at her.

"yeah the way you talk to my fish? Don't think so sister." Snapped Kisame.

Oreo went to her belly. "I was just doing pranks on you guys."

"right. Well this is our prank to you." Said Sasori.

Oreo's eyes went wide when they were getting closer. For a split second they felt they couldn't harm her for looking all scare and cute with her ears back, her eyes wide with terror and her belly on the floor. Unfortunately for her that was just a spilt of a second.

"1. 2. 3 Go" ordered Itachi and everyone went on to attack her.

Then the strange thing happens. Smoke came out of nowhere and was fill in the room. Once the strange smoke was gone they gasp at what they saw next.

Where use to be the cat no was a teenage looking girl coughing.

She had red shoulder length hair with purple eyes. She had on boots, a sleeve shirt showing her stomach with a fish net shirt and tight pants. What they couldn't get over is that she had orange tabby cat ears and a tail. In her hand a magical wand you only see in movies.

"gah I can never get use to the damn smoke." She stated which was strange cause she sound just like the devilish cat.

"WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?" shout Hidan thinking his going insane.

"who are you un?" ask Deidara confused.

"your fairy god mother." She said sweetly.

"really?" they all said at once.

"no you bunch of morons. Am Oreo dumbass. What you thought think you'll kill me that easily ha. Tell it to the other guy I had to kill." She stated. They all had their mouth open in disbelief.

"so all this time we were given hell from a 15, 16 year old girl." Said Kakuzu.

"if I were human I will be honored that you say that but SINCE AM NOT A FUCKING HUMAN AND YOUR ALL BUNCH OF DUMASS I HAVE 199 years old" she reported to them but ended up talking to herself "or is it... gah I forgot how many years I have.

"guys let's kill her now un." Said the blonde while everyone agreed.

Oreo noticing this said "you won't dare to."

"oh yes we do." Spat Kisame.

As everyone one was going to attack her for the second time Oreo swipe her wand and another smoke happen. She grinned when the smoke disappear.

All the guys laid there on the floor. As they sat up they scream at one another. They were all small looking like six or five years old.

"oh crap your small." Said Kisame.

"look who's talking?" Snapped Sasori.

"eh Sasori you do realize your human again." Stated the blue man.

The said red head look at himself and scream.

"WHAT THE HELL DID YOU DO TO US BITCH!" scream Hidan.

"hahaha I chibify you." She said happy with her work.

"is that even a word un?' Deidara whisper to Kakuzu who shrug.

"you tried to kill me no." she ask them which they shook their heads.

"well then you guys seen nothing yet." Which they gulp.

Just then the door opens. Everyone in the room look up to see who it was. Konan came in and squeal making everyone sweat drop.

"awwww you all look so cute." She said and grabs Sasori "oh my god..."

"Jashin." Cough Hidan.

"oh you look super Kawaii!!" shriek the woman hugging the poor red head to death.

"what's going on?" ask Pein and saw everybody in chibi form. The man burst out laughing. All of them were S- rank criminal now are little babies.

"haha very funny." Spat Kakuzu crossing his arms and pouting.

"aww so cute." Konan said and hug Sasori tighter.

"ahh Konan could you let Sasori go un?" ask Deidara. The blue head woman nodded and releases the little boy.

"your welcome un" mutter Deidara.

"I didn't ask for your help." Snap the red head at the blonde.

"tsk whatever I guess I'll let Konan to kill you next time." Said the blonde boy making the other scowl.

Before they could argue any longer Oreo spoke.

"well Konan you already saw them so can I continue what I was doing?" ask the neko thing.

Before she could answer a masked man came in the room and hugs a certain blonde.

"awwww senpia you look soooo kawii." He stated hugging the boy.

Oreo sigh and throw her wand at Tobi's head making him resale the blonde.

"ow why you hit me?" he ask crying as the and went back to Oreo.

"cause I felt like it." She stated and looks at the little chibis. She grinned at them evilly. They all had shivers going down there spine.

She swipes her wand again but differently making strange moments. One moment they were in the base living room the next they're in a black room. They all look to one side and saw a glass window and saw Oreo and the others taller than ever.

"now it's time for you guys to learn your lesson." She said cheery.

They stood there confused until some strange light came and went spinning to a vortex.

"now let the fun being."

* * *

**finally!!! now the fun really beings.**

**yeah i try to macth their fighting style in the plan part.**

**well REVEIW please or or no cookie**


	6. Saw 15

**note: i havent seen this movie only in scary movie 4 i think it was. Only seen some parts of it never saw it fully onlys parts. So deal with it.**

**anyways enjoyed bwhahahahaha**

* * *

_Beep_

_Beep_

"Arg what the hell." Mutter Hidan sitting up. He grabs something from his pocket. It was a cheap ass looking cell phone.

'_What the hell?!'_ he thought

He opens it and saw there was a message for him. He presses a button and a voice came out.

"I forgot to say one more thing. If you guys have to pass my test also to get out from were you're at you got to get the golden taco. Which is hidden somewhere in your program your in. Good Luck! Not bwahahahaha" it said.

"Mother fucking devil bitchy cat-thing." Cursed Hidan.

"Ow were am I un?" ask a familiar voice.

"shut up brat you're too loud." Snapped another.

'oh fuck no. out of all the people it had to be with these two dumbasses.' Thought Hidan ready to kill himself.

"I think we're in some kind of movie or something." He replied seeing the surroundings. For some reason it was faimiler.

"no shit." Snap Sasori getting up.

"Sasori you don't even which one is it do you un." Stated the blonde.

"oh shut up. It's your fault anyways." The older man said.

"WHAT?!" shierk Deidara in rage.

"HOW DARE YOU SAY IT WAS MY FAULT?! YOU HAD SOMETHING TO DO WITH IT!"

"oh shut up brat. It really was since you pissed the stupid cat and attack it."

"so did you un. Stop blaming me cause it was also your damn fault." Growl Deidara.

Hidan was wishing he can get a gun and shoot himself. Trying to ignore the two artists fighting the Jashinist try to see for any clues. As he kept looking around he noticed that the place look like a bathroom. He doesn't know why this looks really familiar but it still doesn't click in his mind.

He went back to the arguing ex couple and stood in front of them.

"ok faggots listen up and stop your forsaken arguing!" he snapped at them. Both artist got quiet and look at him having his attention.

"ok look. If you two don't stop you're arguing we will never go back to the base. Also that bitch message me saying the way to get out of every movie we have to find a golden taco. Understood." He said.

Both chibi nodded there heads.

"wait why a golden taco?" ask Sasori.

Hidan shrug "how the hell am I suppose to know."

"hey don't you guys smell something awful un?" ask Deidara sniffing the air.

The others sniff and smell something rotten.

"yea your right." Hidan said.

"ok why don't we search for clues?" ask Sasori. The other nodded and look around.

After a while they found some things. Mostly there was traps, a chair with spikes on it and other gruesome stuff.

"why does this seem really fucking familiar? I know I seen this hellhole somewhere." Mutter Hidan trying to think.

"wasn't there a movie like this one?" ask Sasori.

That's when they heard the blond scream. Both man went were they heard the scream and saw Deidara ready to puke.

They look what made the blonde sick making them sick well Sasori. Hidan just poke on it.

It was a guy almost dead.

"ew that's disgusting un." Mutter Deidara.

"yeah." Agreed Sasori.

Both man scream when the guys hand went forward.

"help me." He said in a tired voice.

"he he we need help too you know un" replied the blonde.

'get out he'll get you. Get you all and kill you." He said and cough.

Hidan rolled his eyes and got a saw and started killing him with it. Once he was done he did his normal ritual.

"HIDAN WHAT THE F!" scream Deidara horrify.

"what? Am only doing my ritual." He stated.

"yeah well that was pretty low plus I don't think Jashin well like an almost dead person." Said Sasori.

"whatever. Beside I was doing him a favor by letting his suffer end." He said.

Sasori rolled his eyes and grab Deidara by the wrist.

"come on lets find a exited while the psycho finish." Suggest Sasori for the first time the blond didn't object.

After an hour or so they didn't find anything. Neither the exited nor the golden taco. All three of them sat down in a circle and trying to come up with an idea.

Then all three jump when they heard a gate open. They couldn't see where it was coming from but some sort of puppet came in with a bicycle.

"Hello children. Wanna play a game?" It said.

Just by saying that it hit Hidan what this movie was. He nudge at the other two.

"guys we're in Saw." He whisper.

"what? You sure?" ask the puppeteer.

"yeah. The traps, the guy the bathroom, that thing." The silver head whisper back. "we got to find a way out of here and fast. Try tricking him or something."

Both guy nodded their heads.

"hello children." It greeted.

"oh Danna look a doll un." Deidara said clapping his hand "can we play with it."

"it looks really ugly." Comment Hidan.

Jigsaw look pissed.

"Shut up!" he snap catching their attention.

"oh yes lord ugly." Said Sasori grinning.

Jigsaw ignore him and said "want to play a game?"

"yea" all three cheer clapping their hands.

"we love games." Said Sasori.

"yeah expect if it has to do with Xbox. Mommy said we can't play those games cause it had a lot of blood and stuff little kids can't play un" stated Deidara.

"yea also is the game tag cause I hate running for no reason." Said Hidan.

"err no. We're going to play my game." Jigsaw said making them cheer again.

"what is it about?" ask the Jashinist.

"ok you" he point to the blond.

"it's Deidara."

"ok Deidara" jigsaw said mocking "you have to cut open your eye with this knife and get the key or your red head friend's arm will be broken."

"don't want to." Said Deidara shaking his little head.

"do it or else."

"naw cant we play candyland instead un"

"no"

"please"

"no"

"pretty please." All three joining in.

"NO."

"pretty please with cheery on top." Said Hidan.

"No."  
"YES"

"NO"

YES WITH FUCKING CHERRY ON TOP" Hidan screaming the last part.

"ok. Ok but if I win you guys play my game." He said.

"deal".

The candyland board came out of no where and set.

"ok am red." Said Jigsaw.

"no I am" said Sasori. Jigsaw sigh in frustration as was getting the yellow one Dei grab it first.

"fine the blue one."

"NO mine" screech Hidan.

"grh stupid kids." He mumble.

So they started to play. After 30 minutes of arguing and playing Jigsaw was in the lead.

'shit' they all thought.

"OH MY GOD IT'S THE POLICE!!" yelled Deidara pointing where Jigsaw came.

The said puppet look afraid and look where the little blond girl was pointing. Little did he knew Hidan switch the cards? Seeing no one there he mumble to himself of blond and little annoying girls.

"ok my turn." He said as pick out the card his mouth went wide open.

The card had Plumby the green fat thing eating a plum. His eyes start to twitch if it was possible.

"you got to be kidding me" he mutter.

"you know the rules." Said Sasori grinning.

Jigsaw growl and put his charters back almost were they stared it. Then it was Sasori turn who got two orange and smirk. He was once on the purple then went to one orange then to the kingdom.

"I win." Said the red head.

"WHAT?!" yelled Jigsaw he glare at all three of them.

"you guys are bastards. Your cheater all of you." He said.

"hey dumbass your not to say fucking bad words." Said Hidan smirking and making Jigsaw full of rage.

"you just said bad words." He said.

"I fucking did not said a damn bad word." The silver head grin.

"AHHHHH" THE puppet scream attacking them.

All three of them ran away. They went were he came from and slid under the gate since it was only a little bit open for them to slid.

"go go go." Said Hidan running with the two artists following.

"hey to that house un" suggest Deidara.

They went to a house that was near the warehouse that was abounded looking. They open the front door and went inside.

"split up?" ask Hidan the others nodded.

All three of them went upstairs in different rooms.

In one Deidara went in what look like a bedroom and went under the bed. The other one Hidan went in a closet while Sasori hid behind a curtain in another room.

Jigsaw petal to where his house was at. He was panting really hard as he went running upstairs.

He took out his walky-talky and said "hey John there's little kids in the house."

"ok Jig."

The doll thing check in every room. He went to open a room that lead to the office.

Sasori stayed still when he heard the room open. He hold his breath when someone came inside. It walk around muttering stuff and cursing.

After it was done searching it look at him or at least his direction. It made the red head froze. Lucky for him the shadow left walking away. Sasori started to breath again. He wait for a few minutes and went to check outside.

He was hoping not happen to his blond nor that annoying fool. He open the door slowly.

He peek outside and saw nothing. Another thing he was happy for was that he was the last one to go to a room so he new were the others went. The closest one was Hidan so he went to his door quietly trying not to make a sound.  
As he got close he heard a sound which made him froze once more. Seeing as it was nothing he quickly got inside the room.

It turn out to be a closet.

"Hidan are you here?' Sasori call out in a low voice.

"yeah come here you'll laugh your ass off." He replied back.

Sasori found that there was a space under one of the shelve so he crawl inside.

Inside was a secret room and once inside Sasori laugh out loud.

To think that they were dealing with a killer. In the room there was a lot of Barbie dolls with "sexy" clothing all around the room also it was pink. Everywhere they look it look super girly. They continue laughing until they heard a scream.

"oh no." mutter Sasori "Dei"

Both chibi look wide eyed at each other.

Both ran out of the room and downstairs where they heard the scream.

There was a old looking man holding Deidara by his ponytail.

"well I guess the bait work." Said Jigsaw who is next to the man.

"Give him back." Snarled Sasori.

"why should we. She was a bad girl weren't you dear." The old man said.

"hey John maybe she can be our toy to play with when you know. She seems way better then by girlfriends upstairs." Stated Jigsaw.

Both guys had a horrify expression on their face. It wasn't what they were going to do to the blonde boy but what they call him.

Deidara pop a nerve.

"you think am a girl?" he ask with anger.

"yeah a very cute one." Replied the old guy name John.

That did it. Deidara kick the guy in the nuts making him release the blond. While he crouch down the little chibi Dei punch him and scratch him.

"AM A FUCKING GUY. MALE. MAN. YOUR LUCKY I DON'T HAVE MY BOMBS WITH ME OR ELSE YOU'LL BE SORRY!!!" he yelled.

While the blonde was beating the guy up Jigsaw got a bat out of no where and hit the blonde on the back. Deidara yelp and turn to him his eyes on fire and tackle him.

"gah get it off me." The puppet yelled. John was getting up which was painful and kick the blond off the puppet.

Deidara growl and started to beat the man again. Only this time banging him with the bat.

Jigsaw got a knife out of his pocket and was ready to throw it to the blond.

Sasori thinking fast tackle the guy to the floor.

Both guys were rolling on the floor.

Hidan was watch the battle on till he saw something shiny. He look where it came from and found what it was.

The Golden Taco!

Problem it was all the way up on the cabinet and he was what three feet tall.

"oi" he mutter and start to climb the counter. Once there he put stuff to reach the cabinet

As the others were fighting Jigsaw saw that Hidan was reaching for the Taco.

"John the kid is getting the taco we're doom." He shout to his partner.

"ok am on it" he said. He grab the blond by the throat and throw him to the silver that almost reach the Taco.

"ah" both scream and fell down.

"mother fucker I almost had that fucking taco. Your all dead going to Jashin." Declare Hidan piss off.

As Hidan got his scythe out of no where he started to stab the older guy he shout to the blonde.

"yo Blondie get the damn fucking golden shitty taco already!"

Deidara shook his head and start to climb. While climbing Jigsaw got hold of Sasori his colloar of his shirt.

He toss the chibi man across the room making him hit the wall. Seeing as he was dizzy Jigsaw started to follow the blonde.

Standing on tiptoes Deidara almost grabing the Golden Taco.

"un almost un" he mutter.

"I think not." growl Jigsaw kicking the stuff out making the blonde almost lose balance. Luckily he was holding the shelve of the cabinet

Growling Jigsaw try to jump and grab the blond that was hang on the door. Sasori shook his head and saw want was happing.

He grab the knife and aim it to the puppet thing.

He throw the knife making it hit the puppet on the chest. Although the puppet is made wood it made a impact on him.

"damn you" he yelled at the them.

Sasori was already climbing the counter and was grabbing a hold on the blond leg and putting him on his shoulder.

"go dei go!" he said trying his best to lift the blond up. Jigsaw got the knife out and grab it going towards both chibi.

"Dei hurry." Said Sasori feeling his shoulder hurting.

Jigsaw tackle the red head making the bomber hold on to the cabinet.

"you think that will hurt me" snarl Hidan when the old man try to stab him with his pocket knife.

"bwhahhahaa die die die." Yelled Hidan making the guy scream in pain. Jigsaw and Sasori were rolling on the counter till they fell down on the John and Hidan.

"ow I hate being human again" mutter Sasori.

Jigsaw saw his chance and push Sasori to Hidan making them both get of his partner.

John got up full with blood all over his chest. He was breathing hard and grab both boys by the hair.

Both yelp by surprise and started kicking and punching in the air as the guy lift them up.

"ha to easy" he wheeze. "jigsaw take the knife and slice this one throat."

He throws Hidan on the ground and before he can escape put his foot on his chest.

"ha try it fucker." Spat the Jashinist struggling to get free.

"gladly." Replied Jigsaw.

Seeing as John was close to the counter he laid down the red head who was struggling to get free.

"oh stop that. Now am going to put you out of your mercy." He stated getting his knife closer to the red head neck.

As both killers put the knife near their throats Deidara pull himself up and try to reach for the Golden Taco.

'almost there' he thought sticking his tongue out. 'one, two three.' He pull himself a little bit higher losing the hold on the cabinet. When he fell on the counter again he open his hand and smile.

"I GOT IT!" he yelled happily holding it up.

At the same time two things happen. One the assassins slice the two captive two they fail cause they disappear in some kind of powder thing.

* * *

**please reveiw.**

**yes the puppet thing is alive and have its own soul. XD**


End file.
